Movies that you like that I think are awful to disappointing

I don't mean that to be combative. I'm just saying that most people like the following movies and I just don't like them. Well, enough of this flim flam. Let's get to the list.

1. Super Bad. Maybe there was just too much hype. Maybe I should have seen it earlier. But I saw this on DVD (and yes, I have it on DVD) soon after it hit stores. I watched with Luke and Jay over Christmas break. They thought it was great. I was so disappointed.

I mean, there were some good lines. But for the most part, I thought it was just not funny. I didn't like Michael Cera's character, or the curly haired kid, or the nerd. Perhaps if I hadn't heard how great the movie was for a year before I saw it, Super Bad would have been funnier to me. But alas, I did and it was not.

2. District 9. When I first saw an ad for this movie, I thought it would be like Independence Day, only with better graphics. I mean, aliens, graphics, and Peter Jackson. And the result was...pure crap.

It's almost like somebody remade Jurassic Park, renamed it "Brian and the Clonoo-saurus" and it ended up being stupid. Plus some really subtle (and by that I mean as subtle as a sledgehammer) political themes about racism and Apartheid.

Now, of course, nobody is pro-Apartheid. And I'm not saying I am. But I don't want to watch a movie about aliens and be reminded of how terrible South Africa's record on human rights is. Call me old fashioned.

3. The Deer Hunter. On paper, a war move, De Niro, the guy who played Freddo and Christopher Walken sounds like a formula for success. And in the end, we're left with a slow, boring and stupid movie. There was only one good scene (di di mao) and most of the movie was about drinking beer. Anybody who says they like this movie and is under 45 should not be trusted to have good taste in movies. Even average taste is movies is out of the question for fans of this movie.

4. Departed. Now, this movie was good. But I thought it could have been an all-time great. Epic (hi Laura) caste, great story, good plot twist potential. All on paper though, unfortunately.

I thought Jack Nicholson mailed this one in. And it really killed the movie. He could have made this movie an all-time great like the Godfather or Godfather II by nailing the role of the head of the organized crime family.

But he was Colonel Jessup, the Joker and the author from As Good as it Gets. In other news, he was the same character he has been since 1989.

Next, it was a little (and by little I mean very) heavy handed. The rat at the end? Was that necessary, Marty? We're not morons, we understand what happened.

The killing at the end? A little too easily wrapped up. Damon killing Jack? Jack being a rat himself? Damon trying to screw over Leo's undercover character? Come on, we see this coming Marty.

In the end, this was a good movie. But it left too much on the table and could have been great or better. Too bad.


5. Forgetting Sarah Marshall. I couldn't even finish the movie it was that bad. Seeing the dude's junk in the first few minutes didn't help anything either. This movie is similar to Super Bad. I just heard so many people say it was so good. Expectations were somewhat high and the movie was just...disappointing.

6. Step Brothers. Now, I like John C. what's his name and Will Farrell. And I like stupid comedy. But this movie was crap. Another movie I couldn't watch. I had to turn off the TV both times I tried to watch it. What was good about this movie? Farrell shouting? I've see him do that ten times before. It's no longer funny. I hope you're saving your money, buddy.

Oh when the Saints go marching in...

Sure, that was a cheesy title, but you'll live. It's also perfectly apt. This is a sports alert for those of you who don't care about sports (this means you, Abbie).

As you're well aware, I'm a huge Texans fan. They are my favorite NFL team, by a long shot. Even though they've been tough to watch at times. And the Longhorns are my favorite football team.

And you're also well aware that I'm a huge fan of all things Texan. Let's face it. You might have a different opinion of Texas than I do, but you're wrong. More on this later.

With the Saints going to the Super Bowl after a stellar game against the Vikings, things are different. (Quick side note: I can't believe how great that game was, considering five of my least favorite [read: most hated] players were involved: Reggie Bush, Brett Favre, Jeremy Shockey, Adrian Peterson and Jared Allen).

Anyway, the Saints going to the Super Bowl is just flat out enormous for the city of New Orleans. Remember, just a few years ago, the Super Dome was leaking and full of people fleeing from Katrina (the Storm, according to people in New Orleans). Now, the Dome is a symbol for redemption and rebuilding.

Now, of course, football is king in Texas. High school football. College football. Two NFL teams. It's all huge in Texas. If the Texans ever make it to the Super Bowl (hell, even the playoffs), Texan fans will go nuts. But it won't compare with what's going on with the Saints.

There is no city that loves one team more than New Orleans absolutely loves the Saints. For so long, the Saints were the only team in town. And they were bad for so long. Sure, there were a few scattered good years, but for the most part, the Saints were the Aints. Yet, the entire city rallied around the team. Not just the football fans, but the ENTIRE CITY.

For nearly the entire season, there wasn't a murder during a Saints game. For a city that is still among the most violent in the United States, that's a telling statistic. The Saints just bring people together.

After the storm, the Saints played an insane game against the Falcons on Monday Night Football. U2 opened the game. Then the Saints blocked a punt for a touchdown early in the game. Listen to the crowd. It was pandemonium.

Sure, it was just one play, but for people who live in New Orleans or love New Orleans, it meant much more. The fans were already in a frenzy, but this sent them over the edge. It seemed like this meant everything would be OK. New Orleans would not only survive, but would thrive once again.

Do you remember where you were when Katrina was bearing down on New Orleans? Do you remember feeling things might never be the same? Do you remember having sad conversations with your friends and family about what could happen? Do you remember having uplifting conversations reliving old memories at the same time? Do you remember taking in refugees? Do you think you'll ever forget that?

Now, do you remember where you were when the Saints made it to the Super Bowl?

Rooting for the Saints isn't the right thing to do because you've been to New Orleans and had a po'boy or a hurricane. Or a beignet or a hand grenade. Or a chili omelet (with cheese) or a Bloody Mary while doing your laundry. Or caught some plastic beads or golden coconut.

Rooting for the Saints means you're rooting for the city of New Orleans to survive and come back stronger than ever.

Having gone to Tulane and grown up to a degree in New Orleans, I'll always have a soft spot for the Saints. The Saints are more than just a football team. They are a symbol for the entire city. More than just a fleur de lis. Rebuilt. Redeemed.

Getting to the Super Bowl means that the city is almost all the way back. Winning the game would mean so much more. Even though the Colts are favored and likely to win, New Orleans is back.

Oh when the Saints...Go Marching in...

You know what really grinds my gears?

You know what really grinds my gears? People who complain about me not blogging. Hello, I have a real job now. And that job is not writing this nonsense for your amusement.

I'm talking to you, Holly, Michele, Will Hayes, Trey, Jordy, etc. I appreciate you reading and I truly appreciate you wanting to read more, but come on. I can't blog from work anymore, since, you know, I have a real job and can't surf the internet most of the day. In all seriousness, I'm not really mad. This only gives me a jumping off point for this blog post and also gives me a (semi-legitimate) reason/excuse for not blogging more.

You know what else grinds my gears? The new "poppiness" in country music. Country music is only supposed to be about momma, or trains, or trucks, or prison, or gettin' drunk. Not all this whiny crapola that comes on the radio now. I can count on two hands the newer country artists I still like. There are even some older (more established, perhaps) performers who have succumbed to poppy flavor in recent years. Tim McGraw, Dierks Bentley, Rascal Flatts, Keith Urban, etc. I'm talking to you. You are garbage.

You know what else grinds my gears? Two other things, actually, and I'll briefly go into them here. First, people who move their heads constantly while talking. Now, I know I move my hands when I talk. I'll admit. I'm not Italian guy bad, but my hands move when I make emphatic points.

But to move your head like an Alexi Lalas (not sure why I went with Lalas, it just popped into my head as an annoying bobble head guy) bobble head doll is just ridiculous. Stop it. You look like an idiot.

Finally, there is a woman who works where I do. I don't want to say where it is after the other blogging incident at Harris County, but let's just call it the Ralveston Rounty Ristrict Rattorney's Roffice, shall we? This lady, who I've seen walking, parks in a handicapped spot every morning. That's just not right.

There are a few people who work there who need to park close to the building because of their handicaps, and I'm in favor of that. But for a perfectly healthy woman who is just lazy to park there is shameful. And to do it outside the Criminal Justice Center is just flaunting her laziness to a higher degree. She's basically saying I don't give a $hit, give me a ticket, but I'm parking closer to the building than the rest of you suckers.

From the Onion and worth sharing

NEW YORK—In an effort to clear up the confusion caused by terminology such as "unconsistentical" and "splosiverance," CBS producers made a formal request Monday that NFL Today commentator Shannon Sharpe use a minimum of three real words in each sentence.

"We tried to convey to Mr. Sharpe that peppering in a few words that actually exist will help viewers understand what he's talking about," executive producer Sean McManus said. "Providing fans with some context is key for Shannon.

It is much easier to comprehend what he means when he says, 'Andre Johnson needimentally must keep advantagizing opportunimals this week.'"

Sharpe has yet to make any intelligible comment on the situation

The Definition of Irony

Ok, so on my commute to Galveston, I drive by a few of the "adult oriented entertainment" bars in Houston. One of the biggest ones a lot of us have heard of is called "Heart Breakers."

Now, I'm not going into go too far here, so you can relax. This is a family blog. So keep the comments family friendly as well.

Anyway, on to the ironic part. Immediately next door to this establishment is a 40 foot high billboard for a church.

The sign implores motorists and passengers to come to the church after their heart has been broken.

The location, the wording, the imagery. It's great. I think the bill board sets forth this kind of message: go to the strip club on Saturday night and then get forgiven on Sunday in church.

This is perhaps one of the problems with organized religion. (Note I said perhaps so I don't want to hear anything from those of you readers who happen to be more religious than some of the others.) Some of the other problems include war and abuse of children. I suppose I've offended plenty of people so I guess I'll call it a night.

There's no such thing is a small role...Part 1

I don't really know how that line goes or what it means, but whatever. It works as a title.

Anyway, let's get straight to the point. There are certain characters in TV shows (and movies too, but I'm sticking to TV right now) that don't play central roles. They aren't stars. But they bring something big to the table.

Usually there is some humor involved or some sort of quirk. The show would go on without these characters, but they make the show better, undoubtedly. Let's make our way to the list. (Finally, before the list, keep in mind that this is in no particular order. It's just how they came to mind.)

1. Chloe from 24. You know who she is. The quirky/witchy (you know what I mean) computer analyst who handles everything computer related for hero Jack Bauer. Her interactions with other characters is downright hilarious. We all know people like that. Good at what they do but have ZERO personal skills. This is her, to a tee. Priceless.

2. Ted from Scrubs. Good lord, every time old Teddy boy is on the screen, I start laughing. He's such a loser. Bald as a cue ball, completely incompetent. But priceless. It's great when Kelso (and everyone, really) treats him like garbage. The incident with the dog being smarter than Ted...gold. And let's not forget the singing. Oh, the singing.

3. Clay Davis from The Wire. He is best known for being a corrupt state Senator, but if you ask me, his best attribute is the way he elongates the "S", "H", and "I" in one of America's favorite curse words. Really adds some humor to the show. Also he has a cool mustache.

4. Eddie from Frasier. Great looking dog. And a great actor, too. I don't know if everyone considers a dog an actor, but this dog is great. Barking at the right times. Running at the right times. Starting at Frasier at the right times. Pure comedic talent.

5. Jackie Chiles from Sienfeld. You may know him as Kramer's attorney. Loosely based on Johnnie Cochrane, Jackie could rhyme anything in a legal setting. He would throw down words that made no sense but still sounded good with the best of them. Take it back, he must have been based on Al Sharpton.

Well, that's part 1. I'll add some more another time.

Happy New Year

2009 was a great year. I'm also sad to see it go.

I graduated from law school, passed the Texas Bar Exam and got a job with the Galveston County District Attorney's office. That's really all I could ask for in a year, but there was more.

Trey moved back to Houston and got out of the Army. He has a son, Michael (not named for Naaman although they have the same sense of direction).

Plenty of friends got married, including Abbie, Laura, and Jenn and Grant.

I bought a billionaire (Mark Cuban) a drink in New Orleans, I hugged a Rocket (Carl Landry) in Houston and I rang in the New Year with Yao Ming's parents.

I took trips to Las Vegas, New Orleans, New York and India. I also went on an amazing BBQ road trip across the great state of Texas.

With that being said, 2010 could be even better. I'm not sure how, but I'm confident it will be. Happy New Year everyone.