Wednesday, September 16, 2009

Random Musings #2

I realize times are tough. People are out of work and are willing to take something that is not quite their dream job because they have bills to pay. But does Evander Holyfield, "The Real Deal", a former champion in multiple weight classes, have to dress like a woman in Taco Bell commercials? Isn't it bad enough he's appearing in a Taco Bell ad without having to play the role of his mustachioed mother to boot? Have a little pride, champ. I'm sure all those blows to the head did some damage, but you don't need to dress like a woman to pay the bills. I'm sure you can get licenced to fight in Russia, or China, or somewhere. On a related note, how bad is the Patrick "Chewing" Snickers commercial? I will note that some people like it (mostly in France....ahem, Leighton) but I think it's pathetic. Ewing is still a coach in the NBA. He made countless millions playing (and never winning a championship, but I'll not mention that). Does he need the extra scratch that badly? Maybe he could auction of one of his championship rings....oh right. I'd like to make a Gold Club joke, but I'll refrain, since this is a family blog.

A commercial that is really funny is the new Game Day commercial for ESPN with the crew and Mack Brown. (video credit to Dr. Alok Vij) So, Mack is strumming a guitar and the fellas are singing along to "Texas Fight" until it gets to Herby. He starts making up his own lyrics, something about being north of Mexico and Remember the Alamo. Mack shoots him a look and asks what he thinks he's doing. Herby says he's free styling. Mack says "We do NOT free style 'Texas Fight', big boy." Now that is comedic gold.

Will Yester (posts as Gizmo) told me about a guy on Twitter who is hilarious. Now, I'm not on Twitter. I don't really care what people eat for lunch. If I want to know what you're doing every minute of the day, I'll ask you (line credit: Will McMillan) but this guy is funny. Google Sh#t my dad says on Twitter. This chronicles the wacky things a 73 year old man says to his 29 year old son. I won't re-print any here, as they are profane (but not inappropriate). Trust me, this is one Twitter worth checking out.
To kill (editor's note: poor word choice) two birds with one stone, did you hear about Kayne West going to Patrick Swayze's funeral? He told everyone in attendance "I'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute, but Michael Jackson had the best death of the year. I'm just sayin."
In other news, we have a guest version of you know what really grinds my gears sent all the way from Cuba. Take it away Jacki.

Here's something to ponder: Who thought/thinks it was a better, safer, more efficient idea for cyclist to "share the road" vs share the sidewalk? ESP during rush hour in a city. Really? In DC (and I'm sure other cities [editor's note: Havana]) they open the outer (parking) lanes to move traffic... If there's a biker pedaling away there, you may as well park a car there because it causes the same [editor's note: expletive deleted] backup. And for what reason? So you can be "active" in the morning? And to not even be totally selfish about's just not safe. One careless driver (and there a a gazillion) and you're going to have a highly unfortunate situation, whereas if there's carelessness on the sidewalk, what's the worse that would really happen? Someone gets his foot run over?

On a related note, how is it permissible for delivery trucks to use the outer lane as a standing lane during rush hour when there's a side street every standard block (.1 mi). Believe me hoss, you can wheel your dolley around the corner. You don't have to park right outside the building! If I was a cop, I'd bike my law enforcing [editor's note: expletive deleted] (on the sidewalk) around during rush hour ticketing those people... That's a far greater service to the community than pulling over people at midnight on a wed for going 40 in a 25 on a 3 lane, deserted rd (yes, that happened to me).[editor's note: at least you were going the right direction on a one way street, which, on a related note, can not be corrected by turning onto another one way street]


Frink said...

On the "Patrick Chewing" commercial, I'd say "it's good" but I think it's terrible.

On bicycling, Austin has a separate bike lane on the major streets downtown (in between the right lane and the parking spaces") and it works fine. I also remember in DC around the traffic circles that the people riding their bikes would always zip through large crowds of people at high speeds, which isn't really safe either.

Jordy said...

Get a horse!

Luke said...

Re: Patrick Chewing - How fat has he gotten? Am I the only one who thinks it's pathetic that Snickers had to use some fancy camera work to make it look like he can still dunk?

The man is seven feet, he can probably touch the rim from a standstill, but he can't dunk it?